Sunday, December 31, 2006

911...what is your emergency?

Uhm. Yeah. I am pretty sure that today ranks right up there with one of the funniest days of my life. I will admit that while it was happening, I didn't think it was all that funny...however, looking back, I can laugh and laugh.
It is New Years Eve...I have no plans, other than to spend the evening/night with my kids and the dog...which is fine...but the boys got a gift card from Toys R us...and wanted to spend them, so since we really had no other plans, the three of us made the trek to TRU. I am quite certain that if you look, you will find my picture, along with the delinquents, on the wall under the heading, Persona Non Grata. So. Before I forget...along with their gift cards, the boys are clutching plastic cups full of change that they shook from their piggy banks. Fine, what ever. Except that we are not even IN the store yet and Logan drops his and spills probably $15 worth of change all over the floor in the entrance way. Maybe I should have known then what was to come...anyway...I set the time limit to 1/2 hour and away we went. 35 minutes later we are no closer to knowing what we want than when we got I suggest movies...and right away Logan finds a dozen that he wants! So...he is Patch...I turn my attention to helping my son find a movie or 2 that he wanted to watch...ignoring Logan. BIG MISTAKE. I have never been afraid that someone would TAKE him. Hell no. But when I couldn't find him...I thought maybe I should look for him...have you ever had the sinking feeling in your gut when you know that shrieking noise that you hear is coming from your kid and it cannot be good? Yeah. So. I had that. And I start running toward the back of the store...and there he is...riding a kettle car type vehicle up and down the aisles...with a small band of followers running along behind him! He was far enough away from the department that the car belonged in for me to be embarrassed that he was without my attention for that long...I CANNOT believe that he is doing that. So. When I said "Logan, what are you doing?" he said..."Looking for you." I guess that makes sense to a 5 year old. So. After a few dirty looks from uptight parents and a TRU employee, we got things put back together...and go to collect Patrick...who is afraid to leave the movie dept with the movie that he wants because the alarm will ring and he doesn't want to get in trouble. (which kid is destined for an ivy league school and which one is most certainly going to be a plumber?) At the check out, I was reminded why they have so many coins in their bank...because I HATE to spend change. But it was lesson time. So. After counting out $10.26 for Patch and $14.65 for Logan...the only lesson that was learned was the one I learned and that is no matter how good of an idea taking your kids to TRU sounds, it NEVER is.
We return home and I have to run to the grocery store before they close, which it turns out, just because I don't have plans on NYE, other people in the world DO. And the grocery store closes at 6. So...I start dinner and head out. At the grocery store, it was crowded, but not too crowded...the only thing going on there was a push to save grocery bags, apparently, because I only got 2 bags for $40 worth of groceries...Yes. Congrats jackass, you can fit all of my groceries in 2 bags, HOWEVER, I can't carry those bags. So...I get home to an unusually quiet house. Hmm...what is going on I say? I am informed that while I was gone, Logan dialed 911 and the police showed up! Yes. Logan. The one who had earlier, ridden the kettle car thru the toy store, that one. Uhm...He dialed 911? Yeah...turns out he thought Craig was burning the mushrooms and felt like he should call 911. The police came and "looked around" this is 2nd hand information, because I wasn't here. Had I been here, I think the boys would be in protective custody right now. How embarrassing. (and comical at the very same time.) He seemed upset that the fire trucks didn't show up and that there were no "lights flashing" but we drove home the idea that you don't call 911 UNLESS it is an EMERGENCY. We'll see how long til the next emergency.
So. That has been my day....What an end to an already crazy year!!

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